Learning To Be Mom

Tonight I went to open house at the Spring Cove Middle School with my hubby's niece. Her mom was working tonight & she wanted to go. My hubby didn't feel like going so that left me. I didn't mind, although I did feel a little out of place. I had been in the middle school before but not for a long time. I didn't know my way around so I was counting on her. Well turned out she didn't know her way around too well either!! We made many trips up & down the same hall, but eventually got to where we needed to be.

Then when I met her homeroom, language, and social studies teacher, she assumed I was her mother. I had my daughter with us & she asked her about her big sister. Of course Mackenzie looked at her & said "She's my cousin!" So then the teacher referred to me as Mackenzie's aunt, and again Mackenzie corrected her saying, "That's my mommy!!" Poor teacher!! I guess she should be used to odd family situations in this day & age, but you always assume the norm. So after we got the relationship situation corrected, the teacher begins to tell me that Cassie has missed 2 homework assignments. Well 2 doesn't sound too bad but they've only had 11 days of school. She also told me about a test she has on Friday that she should be preparing for & that she didn't do too well on the last test. Ok so what do I do with this information? I'm not her mother. I've been asking her each night if she did her homework & she says yes, so that's it. I assumed she knew what she was doing & she had it done. Well obviously I was wrong. So now what? I guess I step up to the plate & help the kid out.

So after the open house, we come home & start organizing. She has an organizer thing. So we went through that & she also has a 6th grade planner that she's going to use throughout the school year. The planner has a calendar in it with each subject on it & she's suppose to be writing down her homework assignments. She's been writing down the assignments but still not remembering to do them. So I told her to also write down if she has a test to study for. Now I guess I'm going to have to look at this planner each night & make sure she did everything that's listed on it. This took about 30 minutes this evening to go over everything. And then we discovered she did forget a writing assignment for social studies. So she was suppose to be in bed by 9pm but she needed to do this assignment. So it was about 9:30 til she got there. Hopefully she won't be too miserable & grouchy tomorrow!

I don't know how to be a mom to an 11 year old. Somedays I'm not sure I know how to be a mom at all, but usually out of somewhere instincts kick in & things seem to go ok. But I don't think I have my mom of an 11 year old instincts yet. I guess I'm going to have to learn this one. Well at least I should be prepared for when my kids are 11!! I don't want Cassie to do badly in school, but I don't want to hold her hand all the way either. She's only 11, but she needs to be independent. And then, there's the whole fact that I'm NOT her mother. Her mother is here, but she usually works at night so I guess that lets me to be the substitute mom. Then I have to also remember that I have 2 children of my own that also need my time. So now I'm a full time working wife, mother of a 4 year old, 11 month old, and sub-mom of an 11 year old...I'm still not getting a minivan!!!